Friday, September 17, 2010

Oh, when I get my hands on you...

Hey, BK, GET OUTTA MY COMPUTER!







That accursed person who doesn't understand exaggeration! Of course I get small, miniscule, nearly non-existent breaks! I practically live off of them! ;)







Grr... You knew this was coming Ben, don't make me do it... Are you going to repent? NO?!?! Well then, accept your fate.







I'm sorry Ben, you've gone too far! I really don't want to, but...







IMMA FIRIN' MAH LAZAR! BLAAAAAAAGH! EAT IT SONNY! BLAAAAGH BLAAAAAGH BLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!







MINI LAZARS, OPEN FIRE!







blaaagh!


blaaagh! blaaagh!



blaagh! blaaagh!





blaaagh! blaaagh!








Ready the DEATH LAZAR!








IMMA FIRIN' THE IMPERIAL LAZAR....!








BLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!





IS THIS ENOUGH BK? HAVE YOU OPENED YOUR EYES YET?!

well, have you?

No seriously, Ben... It's all a dream...



I wake up to see the light
Prepared to fight a morning fight
And if I wake to sunny skies
Let it be called my demise
I'm an early riser, see
Getting out of bed at 6 is my destiny
For you, it may be the same
Or perhaps waking up early is a shame
But now, Ben, you can open your eyes
To go and see that sunny sky
To live the world, not ever wander
My words you do not need to ponder
Poetry is not my strong point
But shall I get to my point?
Well, the rhyme is but to make you think
So this blog post may not stink
So if you thought there was a purpose in these verses
Well, YOU'RE WRONG, so feel free to shout 'curses'!

Alas and Alack

Old TotalRB is dead...
Utterly destroyed...
In ruins...
I mean hey, since RB has finally seen the light and realized he's gonna be having no brakes any time soon, TotalRB is kind of toast.
Personally, I never saw it coming, that is, at least until last CCS group- when he revealed his recent revelation to me. So now, this blog is officially slain... *sob*
The funeral will be on the 32nd. Thank you... *sob*

Monday, August 9, 2010

The Story So Far!

Self-explanatory? Vague? NEITHER??? Well, you decide from my title...

This has to do with Ikarus Chronicles. I wanted to sum up everything so far in the story:

In the beginning, there was Walliker. And lo, there were the Ferrans. And they were stubborn in the sense that they refused to accept defeat. So, the great HMW blasted them to pieces at sea, unknowingly preventing them from using the Xalen'Ga-Har relic. He went back to Ikaria to receive as a promotion from the Duke, Vaska, and later went to sleep. He has sweet dreams, pursues his lifelong goal, blah blah blah until the interesting stuff happens. HIS ROOM LIGHTS ON FIRE!!! He is whisked away by a strange figure clad in white, who just so happens to be his seemingly-naive secretary, Ailen Seekret (no pun intended, and I mean it). The two find that a criminal organization called PyRe has allied with the Ferrans. Soon, they go into battle with these two enemy forces and, in the middle of this heated conflict, Duke Vaska himself shows up. He turns against Walliker, planning to kill him, but trusty Ailen whacks him just in time to stun the traitor, allowing Walliker to shoot him. Vaska dies a terrible, awful, and overall painful death. Next thing you know, the Ikarians head to space, where they plan to visit the Or government to strike up a commerce trading deal. Right as they plan to land, these evil aliens catch their ship, the Tactician. Well, right after this, the enemies board the ship, but they have no idea that Walliker himself and a group of soldiers are there to stop them. BOOM goes Walliker's handy-dandy detonation device and the aliens die, right? Nope. Instead they cling for dear life onto the ship floor, making sure not to be sucked into the vast, near-infinite expanse of pitch-black space below. Ailen and Co. kill them by shooting the heads. The duo (you must know by now that I'm referring to W and A) receive a transmission from the leader of this race, the Bions, called Laadinur. He explains to Walliker that Ailen's family was a line of royal guards that were at war with the Bions, from whom they stole that relic. You know, the powerful, ancient, almighty... I'm gonna stop now. Anyway, Laadinur tells them that the Oran branch of PyRe now has the device and offers to make a pact. Walliker accepts, and so our story is left here...


In a little bit, I'm not sure how long, the other part of First and Final Frontier will be released. You can see it only here, on Total RB.

Thursday, July 22, 2010

First and Final Frontier, Part 1

And now, the greatest, most spectacular-stupendous-amazing-mind-blowing short story ever! Behold, THE FIRST AND FINAL FRONTIER (part 1)! NOTE: This is the only Ikarus Chronicle that is not told from Walliker's point of view. I thought I might shake things up a bit.




Ailen sat at his private desk, surrounded by cubicles filled with workers under his command. He never thought that he would get a promotion from minor secretary to chief-of-staff for the new Ikarian President, Henry Mason Walliker. He had saved his master's life twice already and fought an army of fierce enemies. The only thing he wanted to do for the rest of his life was work for Walliker. Or maybe take a year-long vacation. Or both, even though that was impossible. Ailen felt a reoccurring surge in pride. He was almost on top of the world, near the highest rung of the ladder. He fortunately or unfortunately could neither be on a ladder or on top of the world. He was in space, the vast darkness and blackness that hung above his warring home-planet Rosacua. At that very moment, he sat aboard the Executive-class Tactician. While Ailen thought about everything he'd done to deserve being on the Tactician, Walliker was on the command bridge, observing the ship's destination: a planet called Or in the Salice sector, a few lightyears away from Rosacua. He was there to negotiate a pact that would allow the two planets to trade resources freely. But he was told to do it as quickly as possible, even though the last trace of Ferran rebellion on Or was wiped out fifteen years ago. Walliker wasn't one to take things lightly after being at war with Gahn and the Ferrans for at least two decades. But he wasn't to worried about enemies on Or but more about enemies above Or. The Salice sector had been attacked frequently by an elusive alien race, but they were only attacked in space. Everyone aboard was tense with excitement or fear. Excitement thinking about the probable success of the pact. Fear of an unknown enemy. Walliker experienced neither. He was simply cool, calm, and collected. "We are entering Or airspace in 3... 2... 1..." proclaimed Walliker. Suddenly, he halted the countdown. "Wait," he shouted, "the ship will not descend!" One of the pilot's assistants whispered something in Walliker's ear. His eyes grew wide as he nodded. With shaky hands, he picked up the communicator. "All passengers aboard the Tactician, we have lost all control of the ship. The mysterious aliens that have preyed upon the Or are now upon us. They will board the ship soon. Prepare your weapons..."



**************************************************************************



One score men stood outside the entry door, waiting for any sign of resistance as the enemy ship finished prearing the boarding ramp. Walliker's idea was to not shoot at the enemy until they had started boarding. It would leave them stranded on the Tactician and unable to escape. Suddenly, a strange beeping noise emitted from beyond the blast doors. "That can't be good, men," called Walliker. "Fall back now!" As the soldiers slowly retreated from the door, the beeping noise grew more rapid. "It must be a bomb," whispered a soldier. "Everyone hide," yelled Ailen, who was now at the sealed entryway with the others. Walliker threw a cloaked detonation device, a favorite stealth weapon of the Ikarian people, in front of the blast doors. That was when the beeping stopped. For a split-second, everyone thought that the bomb must have been disfunctional, but a loud BOOM followed the silence. The creatures that came through the doorway were some of the scariest things the crew had ever seen. They were each at least six-and-a-half-feet tall, had the skin of humans, and had only three bony fingers on each of their three hands (two in a normal position, the other on their chest). Oh, and did I mention that on top of this they had flamethrowers, pulse rifles, and the latest and most advanced in military technology. Walliker, hidden behind he control panels with Ailen and another soldier, took a black remote from his pocket. Grinning, he put his fingers on a red button in the center. Ailen and man beside him covered their ears. Without hesitation, Walliker pushed the button. What followed was strange to the crew. The explosion blew a hole in the ship floor that sucked the creatures into space. The blast had taken out the legs of the enemies, but they still clung to the remaining part of the floor. They attempted to pull themselves up when the previously-timid Ailen jumped out from his hiding spot and shot the hands of an alien. The bullet ricocheted off of the target's hand! Ailen went for the head on his second shot, and the alien burst open, remains flying out from under the ship. He cringed at the sight. At least the others knew what to shoot at. Soon the aliens had all been killed. "Nice shooting, Ailen," said Walliker. Ailen shrugged. "Don't mention it," he responded. "INCOMING TRANSMISSION," boomed a voice over the loudspeakers. Walliker's gaze met Ailen's and they rushed to the holoprojector. Walliker pressed a button and the image appeared. It was one of the enemy troops. No, their leader! His appearance was like that of the others, but wings protruded from his back and a black cloth cover his mouth and neck. "Greetings, Commander Walliker," said the enemy leader. "I am Laadinur, leader of my race. I believe that you have something that belongs to me." "What might that be, hostile?" questioned Walliker. "Your companion's family, loyal guards, were sworn enemies of my people. They plundered our treasuries and destroyed our ships in this sector. In one raid, they stole the Xalen'Ga-Har relic, an ancient device that could destroy objects and people by using sheer willpower." Ailen looked appalled, but he could not deny it. Recently, he had discovered the truth about his family. But that was nearly a thousand years ago. What would Laadinur want with it now? "Do you have any proof of where the artifact is?" snapped Ailen. "Indeed I do," replied the alien. "It has been right under your noses all this time. The Ferrans originally planned to take it to sea and destroy Ikaria, but you destroyed the FSS Pike. Now, it has been sold to PyRe members below us on Or. I ask for your help in retrieving the artifact. If you do, my army will fight alongside you against your enemies." Laadinur paused. "Is it a deal?" Ailen looked worried. "What if he turns out to be a traitor?" he wondered. "He hates my family, so-" "Ailen Seekret," said Laadinur firmly, "I do not despise your family. They were right to hate my predecessors. It is in Bion blood to hunt, kill and destroy." "So you are the infamous Bions?" asked Walliker. "Yes indeed," admitted Laadinur, "but I wish to erase the demons of the past by allying with you. Will you accept?" Ailen looked at Walliker, who had his head down. Suddenly, he looked upwards and said, "I accept, Laadinur. Behold, the greatest alliance of all time!"


My stories have morals: reconciliation and forgivness is the main part of this one. And, yes, that battleship in Story #1 did have a purpose. All is revealed in time!

Tuesday, July 20, 2010

All in Due Time...

...Will the next Ikarus Chronicles be revealed! Get ready for a whopper of a short story... cuz it'll be in two parts! With epic SPACE battles, new races, crime bosses and the impeccable Ailen, "First and Final Frontier" parts one and two are going to be spectacular! After this, expect even more frequent posts and an upcoming plotline for my first work of art, Mastermind of Malice (renamed "Struggle"). I'm looking forward to completing all of these posts and I hope YOU enjoy them, because that's what this blog is all about. I'm up to 29 posts (that includes this one) and "First and Final Frontier, Part 1" will be my 30th. Hope you've loved the blog so far! I love just entertaining others and making them think, and even suggesting things. So, in short, hope you've loved my work. There will be much more, I promise.

Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Plotlines Galore!

Hello all! I'm back with another post as promised.

Today, I want to talk about two important plot lines (ALERT: a bit of spoiling): one for Empire Without End and another surprise one. Here goes nothing...

"Empire Without End" is a story about terrorism, vengeance, how-much-is-enough and leadership. The story begins with Amir Kaeef, the new emir of al-Qaeda. He has just recently assumed the position and he plans to make the U.S. pay for not allowing his family to live there. He devises a brilliant plan to attack DC and assume control of more than just is terrorist organization. We move along to Captain Bradley Rush, the leader of Marine Squadron 2214 (also known as Delta Marine Snow) who has a meeting with none other than our current president Obama, who informs him of an al-Qaeda broadcast that warns the U.S. of destruction. We next meet Finch, an orphan who has no one to care for him but his aunt, a nasty aunt albeit. He was formerly the son of CEOs, but after an anthrax attack, he was left parentless. He is twisted by revenge and hatred, longing to destroy his parents' murderer. Our plot line introduction concludes with the appearance of Delta Marine Snow in Chapter 5. The two men from this squad that are actually described in the chapter are Jasper Cloke and Blake Rowley, both complete opposites. Jasper is a stick in the mud, were as Blake is a optimistic and firm man. Along the way to their "home" (technically a mansion owned by a rich member of the squad), Jasper confronts an Iranian with a strange-looking briefcase. He figures out just in the nick of time that the man is a terrorist operative and kills him before he can shoot an innocent civilian.

This is still under construction. Hopefully, I can turn this into a trilogy of books about Amir, Delta Marine Snow, Finch and a whole host of other characters. I am going to post the second plot line in a post later today. Stay tuned!

Sunday, July 11, 2010

Going to Wisconson

Hey guys! It's me!

I will be leaving for the beautiful Cheesehead State on Wednesday! But before I leave, I will post at least TWICE. Sorry for not posting very frequently over the summer. I've been going low-key on the blog, but that will change. With more sun, comes more Ikarus Chronicles short stories (you know you love 'em!) and snipets of my new book: Empire Without End. It's all about terrorism in Afghanistan and America, revenge, and fate. Remind yourself to ask questions like these as you read the chapters:

1. Who is Amir? Why does he do what he does?
2. What are the choices Finch will make?
3. Is President Obama showing leadership and courage or not?
4. Does Captain Rush do the right thng for his squad?

Oh, and remember, I'm on Twitter. Plus, go check out my other blog, "I've Got Writter's Blog". I do it with a friend, so be sure to follow him. I'll eventually get him to post on this blog, but don't expect him to do that real soon. Just a warning...

So, see ya later!

Friday, July 2, 2010

Tweet Tweet Tweet all about it!

What's up guys?

Well, I just got a Twitter page, so follow me at www.twitter.com/TotalRB

I promise...

You won't be disappointed...

Wednesday, June 30, 2010

I'm really bored

As you can read, I'm very bored...

My guitar lessons are today, but that's it...

The rest of today is just reading Alex Rider, Listening to the 39 Clues, and hoping that I will get that new Rick Riordan book...

I love my guitar...

Today, I will finally be able to use it, considering I have no past guitar experience...

Did anyone hear that Civilization V is coming out! Yeeeeeeessssss...

And so is Kirby's Epic Yarn, Legend of Zelda: Skyward Sword, and Starcraft 2...

How much Nintendo is a Nintendon't?

I know that there are way too many sequels...

I feel bored... Please cure me!

Maybe go-karting, kung fu, or zip lining will cure this...

WAAAH! I really need to read, so peace out!

Wednesday, June 23, 2010

My Pot o' Gold

I have great news: I got a brand new guitar! After 2 years of asking for a guitar and lessons, my plea was finally answered.

The brand: Ibanez
The type: an acoustic
The name: "Pot o' Gold" (I named it myself)
Description: Has a solid-spruce top (not laminated), colored beige, pearl knobs to tune guitar, six strings, just one size under adult and has normal acoustic guitar shape.
The price: $259.99
The accessories: Two picks, electric tuner, padded case and black stand.

If this isn't enough, you can probably find a pic online showing you the guitar.

Sunday, June 20, 2010

The Most Annoying Songs: Top Three

Here it is, the top three most detested melodies in all the land.

In third place, we have "Peanut Butter Jelly Time"! Some people have very mixed feelings about this song. It is enjoyable yet annoying at the same time.

In second place, we have "Mashed Potato Time"! I don't know why someone would bother inventing this tumultuous tune! Seriously? You're going to sing about potatoes?! Give me a break.

In first place, we have a TIE!!! It's between two Lady GaGa songs: Bad Romance and Telephone. Both are way too electronica and annoy me. But it's not up to me to decide which is worse. It's YOUR choice! Leave a comment telling me which is the worst!

Monday, May 31, 2010

Music Suggestions

Must I explain? Here is the lineup!

1. "Halfway Gone" - Lifehouse
2. "You and Me" - Lifehouse
3. "Alive Again" - Matt Maher
4. "The Words I Would Say" - Sidewalk Prophets
5. "All of Creation" - MercyMe
6. "Hold Us Together" - Matt Maher
7. "Healing Begins" - Tenth Avenue North
8. "Give Me Your Eyes" - Brandon Heath
9. "That's What Faith Can Do" - Kutless
10. "Yellow" - Coldplay
11. "The Scientist" - Coldplay
12. "By Your Side" - Tenth Avenue North
13. "On and On" - Chasen
14. "Hold My Heart" - Tenth Avenue North
15. "S.O.S." - Jonas Brothers

Don't hate me for liking the Jo Bros, okay?

Sunday, May 30, 2010

The few cons of "SMG2"

Yes, "SMG2" stands for my favorite game ever, "Super Mario Galaxy 2". There are a couple flaws that the game has, but just a few.
  • I have a problem with Yoshi's new voice. It's way, way, WAY to high-pitched for my liking.
  • What's up with the stupid Cosmic Clones? Very annoying, especially on a certain hidden star level that requires you to have Cloud power.
  • There are too many levels where you have to collect silver stars. They're hard to find on water levels.
  • I have a HUGE problem with the mini-boss Sorbetti on the Frosty Flake Galaxy. He's so hard to defeat.
  • Lastly, BLASTED BEE MARIO RETURNS! I never liked that power-up...

Those are the few flaws of "SMG2".

When in doubt, you can either...

1. Push random buttons

OR

2. GO ROMA!

I chose the second option. I'm leaving for Europe on Monday to enjoy Italy, Greece, and Turkey on a ten-day cruise. I will return on the 17th of June to the States and tell you about my adventure. I will hopefully be able to blog in Rome, Athens, Sicily, and Ephesus. I will tell you all about it!

Saturday, May 29, 2010

Why you should get Super Mario Galaxy 2

GALAXY TWOOOOO! It is my favorite Mario game ever and here are reasons that you should get it:

  • It has the same simple, easy-to-use controls as Super Mario Galaxy
  • Yoshi makes his debut in Mario's space games
  • The second player's Luma actually appears! You can grab, stop, and defeat enemies with it
  • LUIGI TIME! You can play as Luigi on certain stages
  • Store Lumas now sell chance dice. Roll the dice to win an item
  • More power-ups! Mario power-ups include Cloud Mario, Rock Mario, and Spring Mario. Yoshi power-ups include Blimp Yoshi, Bulb Yoshi, and Dash Yoshi.
  • All new soundtrack featuring your favorite classic Mario songs and new and definitely cool background music
  • New Cosmic Spirit guides finish the level for you. But use wisely! You'll get a Bronze Star if you use the guide.
  • New Comet Medals allow Prankster Comets to enter a galaxy. Complete these levels for even more Power Stars
  • Mario has his own spaceship! Travel the universe in the "Starship Mario"

Find Super Mario Galaxy 2 at your local Target. That's were I got mine!

Wednesday, May 26, 2010

Wild Short Story Appears!

Pardon my Pokemon-esque title, but I can't resist making fun of it. Here's the short story: "Infiltrators".

"I stood facing the entire Ikarian army. The army, clothed in crimson, was like a scarlet wave that would crush all in its path. I sure hoped it would. We were about to face enemies in our own country. The organization PyRe had requested help from the Ferran Federacy, asking if thy would lend them 15,000 men. Obviously, the Ferrans would have thought this outrageous, but since PyRe's ultimate goal was to destroy Vaska, me, and all of my troops, they agreed to the terms. "Men," I started, "you will all meet a dangerous enemy today. An enemy chock full of your most hated rivals: the Ferrans. These scum have tried to murder our people and assassinate our leaders for centuries. It is time for us to return the favor. Today, you meet hostiles on the field of battle. Today, you give the enemy a beating that they'll never forget!" The army cheered as I turned and moved my platform forward. I saw another massive army, only clothed in burgundy and yellow. "Ready the laser batteries," I told the brigadier general. The enemy raised their weapons: guns, electricity bows, and beam swords. I pointed my arm upwards, then let it drop. The batteries unleashed their payload, cutting down the first few ranks. When the laser cannons had to recharge, my riflemen took the lead. They took aim and fired, taking out some of the swordsmen. The opponents shot their first volley of electric arrows, hitting some of my riflemen. They kept on firing despite loses. I knew my troops were more disciplined and civil than the Ferran mercenaries and the criminal fighters. They wouldn't break rank easily. Just then, a crime lord jumped onto my hovering platform. He sneered as he flicked an plasma whip dangerously close to my face. I grabbed a beam sword and engaged in hand-to-hand combat with the villain. His whip crackled as I struck it with my sword. However, the arrogant gang leader had no idea that Ailen was concealed nearby. He jumped at the PyRe boss with lighting speed and, in a flash, the enemy was slumped on the platform. "Nice work," I told Ailen. Ailen nodded and jumped into the fray below. I lowered the hover platform and grabbed a fallen soldier's rifle. I hit three enemy archers within seconds. Beam swordsmen were alerted by the others and charged me. "Don't you have manners?" I taunted as I pulled out an plasma whip, made by Ailen. It was bright yellow and flashed as I cut down my foes. The laser batteries had recharged, and the criminals were breaking rank already. The lasers tore through the mercenary lines, but the Ferrans, more obedient than the PyRe scum, stood firm. I continued to hack at the remaining soldiers, but suddenly, the whip was knocked out of my hand. I turned to see Duke Vaska with a gun to my temple. The conflict froze. All eyes were on me and the duke. "Traitor," I yelled. "You're right, Walliker." Vaska let the words drip of his mouth like honey. "I work for the Ferrans. I mislead you and they won't kill me in battle. So far, you keep wining. I need you to lose, and what better way to do that than give you direct orders. You're in an urban area, surrounded by innocent civilians. The more deaths, the more I am rewarded. So why not kill you?" Ailen once again came to the rescue. He picked up a beam sword and hit Vaska with the hilt. The traitor was confused, so I took this moment to steal his gun. "If you kill me," Vaska whispered, "then my army will unleash!" I picked up a radio transmitter. "Make the drop," I said almost inaudibly. Right then, a squad of Palore bombers dropped their entire cargo. This virtually annihilated the enemy. "What army?" I asked. Vaska moaned. I readied the gun, and fired. I hit Vaska's lung with my shot. "Victory is ours," I shouted to my army as we returned to the capitol. Vaska's last words will forever ring in my mind: "Gahn will return!"

Kind of violent, huh? I know, but it makes a great movie!

Friday, May 21, 2010

Math: Love it or hate it, but no time to debate it!

... Instead, we shall discuss my favorite number: 123!

123 x 1: Please, please, please tell me you're kidding.
123 x 2: 246
123 x 3: 369
123 x 4: 492
123 x 5: 615
123 x 6: 738
123 x 7: 861
123 x 8: 984
123 x 9: 1107
123 x 10: 1230
123 x 11: 1353
123 x 12: 1476

That's all the math for today!

Friday, May 14, 2010

Short Stories Return!

Here's the third short story at the request of this shady BK fellow. It's titled "Wildfire".

"I was in a deep sleep. Dreams filled my head. These were dreams of the day that Vaska passed the reins over to me. Suddenly, my quarter's alarms were blaring. I opened my eyes somewhat slowly for an emergency. But this pace quickened once I saw my desk on fire. A figure in a pure white cloak jumped towards me in the darkness. "Don't struggle, just come with me!" I had no time to reply, because just then he grabbed my collar and jumped out the window. "FOOL!" I was not in the mood for falling in anything but my previous sweet dreams. "You're going to kill us!" The hooded figure just jumped onto another building's roof and ignored me. "We are safe here, master," said the man. "Master? What the..." The person took off his hood and I stared at my secretary, Ailen. I about fainted right on the spot, but he just gripped my hand tighter. "What surprises you, master? I was a security agent for Mr. Caelsus before I became a quaint secretary for you." I almost fainted AGAIN. Mr. Caelsus was the most well-protected Ikarian tycoon, fabled for his elite crew of bodyguards. "Ailen, I informally promote you to my chief of staff," I said joyfully. "I owe you." Just then, an electric arrow whizzed past my face. Ailen took out a Magnuma pistol (a sleek, black handgun with 30 bullets) and ran at the would-be assassin in red. He twirled the pistol around his finger wild-west style and shot the enemy. He fell to his knees, muttering, "You will answer to the boss!" He fell sideways and lifeless. Ailen turned to me. "This murderer, he wears a red cape with the letters "P" and "R" emblazoned in yellow. He's a hitman for a criminal syndicate." I recalled something from my studies at the Ikarian Academy. "The organization is called 'PyRe', correct?" I questioned. "You are right, master. Nothing will stop them until they are satisfied. They want you dead." "Who's dying? I've got Ailen Seekret by my side!" Ailen smiled. "No certain Henry Mason Walliker is dying on my watch..."

Wednesday, May 12, 2010

Quote o' the Day

Here's another quote:

"Be careful when reading health books. You might die of misprint."

Guess who? Mark Twain. The Great Comedian himself.

Wednesday, April 28, 2010

This Is BK, My Mysterious Informant. Click The Link for His Photo...

Waddle Dee on Flickr - Photo Sharing!

Quote of the Day - You Choose!

I didn't mean that you can pick THIS day's quote, but (if you comment fast enough) I will allow you to pick another day's quote. I will be in a place where computer access is scarce and water slides are abundant: the Bahamas! I will also allow you to pick the title and plot line for an upcoming "Ikarus Chronicles" short story. NOTICE: YOU MUST BE THE FIRST TO COMMENT! TELL ME THE NEXT QUOTE, TITLE, AND PLOT LINE OF THE NEXT SHORT STORY IN YOUR COMMENT!

Anyway...

Here's the quote: "Am I not destroying my enemies when I make friends with them?"

Guess who said this... HONEST ABE HIMSELF!

That was shocking, was it not? Good. That's my goal.

COMMENT BY FRIDAY 5:00 PM.

Thursday, April 22, 2010

Another Really Short Story

Here's another short story! It's titled "The Elegance of the Duke". Check it out!

"I walked briskly down Vaska's Hall. I knew that the Duke would be pleased with our victory over the Ferran Federacy. Suddenly, a secretary bumped into me. 'What do you think your doing, Ailen. Your supposed to be taking phone calls!' 'So terribly sorry, sir,' Ailen responded, 'I was actually on my way to Major Thurk's office to deliver him that message you wrote.' I gently stroked my growing copper beard. 'Very well, I will allow you to do your business,' I said. 'But next time, I will have you severly punished if you interrupt my dealings again!' Ailen then scurried off towards a door marked 'MAJOR THURK E. THOMPSON'. That naive boy, what will I do with him?! I quickened my pace as I saw Duke Vaska's door. I gently turned the hinge and saw Vaska in his green and black robes. 'Do come in,' Vaska beckoned, 'I've been waiting for your arrival.' I shuffled my feet and stumbled towards him. I bowed awkwardly as he rose. 'Over the years, your career has been marked with victories, Walliker,' the Duke began. 'You won the Battle of Gastor Pass, ten minor skirmishes on Yaken beachhead, and showed great valor at Erit when the Federacy tried to sabotage our production efforts. Most recently, you won at the Sea of Troika during the testing of our new Scabbard. I am very pleased with your victories and..." Here the Duke paused. He grabbed a box inlaid with mother-of-pearl. The lock was golden and the bottom was pure alabaster. 'You deserve what is in this box,' said the Duke with anticipation. 'Open it.' I gently lifted up the cover and inside I saw a medallion of pure gold that shone like the sun. 'You are now the Supreme Commander of the Ikarus Union Armed Forces,' Vaska shouted."

That is part 2 of the Ikarus Chronicles short stories collection!

Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Really Short Story. PLEASE COMMENT

Here is a prototype short story for the blog! It's titled "Persistence of Combat".

"I stood aboard the IUS (Ikarus Union Ship) Scabbard. Cannons fired at a rival cruiser. Shot pierced the air as lifeboats were released. And I, H. M. Walliker, watched it all from a eerily comforting cabin. BANG! The Scabbard was hit! I simply sighed. I knew this ship was unsinkable, but how long would it take for the enemy to realize it? 'Fire a hydro-missile, Level 314B,' I said calmly into the radio to a captain below deck. 'We're going to finish this.' 'For Duke Vaska!' the captain shouted back. 'Our country needs this victory badly. If we don't succeed, the Duke will not be pleased,' I replied more tense than before. 'That hydro-missile better not miss...' I heard a sound underneath me, something like gears turning. I peered over the edge of the open cabin and saw a rounded black object:the hydro-missile. I prayed that the crew had chosen one of the cloakable missiles, and, sure enough, the missile slowly faded into the background. There was no way that the enemy could win if this baby hit them. It packs the punch of 2 hydrogen bombs and moves at 60 miles per hour. The missile would hit the enemy ten seconds after launch. Finally, the captain said, 'Ten seconds to victory...' I saw ripples run through the water. 5. 4. 3. 2. 1... BOOM! The FFS (Farren Federacy Ship) Pike split into two and sunk into the Sea of Troika. 'Victory is ours...' I murmured.

There you have it! The first short story in my short story series 'The Ikarus Chronicles'.

Tuesday, April 13, 2010

Quote of the Day: Sorry for the Delay!

Here's a long-awaited quote for everyone:

"The less government interferes with private pursuits, the better for general prosperity."
~Martin Van Buren

I hope you enjoy these words of wisdom!

Wednesday, April 7, 2010

"Release the Kraken!" What is it?

I'm back with my first post since April Fools Day (I'd love to say I got you, but it's true).

"Clash of the Titans" has just been released. In the trailers, Zeus (played by Liam Neeson) says the infamous words: "Release the Kraken!"

Now, what does Zeus have against mortals? What did they ever do?

The answer is everything. They declared war on the gods. They tore down their statues and desecrated their temples!

Thrilling plot, isn't it? Yes, but I must get back to this "Kraken" thingy that a highly-paid actor is going to unleash on mankind (in 3-D!)...

The Kraken is mentioned in manuscripts dating back to Viking times. Scandinavians claimed that its body appeared to be thousands of tiny islands that, when sailors took them for land and docked their ships there, grabbed everything and everyone aboard and dragged them to the bottom of the ocean. This creature's body, which is like an octopus-squid hybrid, probably came from sightings of the real-life Colossal squid.

Did Perseus really stand up to this thing in myth? The answer is no. The true monster was called Ceto, who was turned into a constellation translated as "the Whale". Frighting and gruesome, huh? In the 1981 version of "Clash of the Titans", this Kraken (which is really the brainchild of Scandinavian mythology) is a humanoid that's 50-feet tall, covered with scales, and has four arms. Perseus turns this beast into stone with Medusa's head to keep it from wreaking havoc on coastal cities in Greece. The newer version looks a lot like a worm body with two huge eyes close together and a mouth like a sinkhole filled with a gazillion teeth.

What happens in the 2010 remake? You'll have to watch to find out.

And that's just another average Kraken history lesson for ya!

Thursday, April 1, 2010

2nd Blog

I know it's early, but I will have another blog up and running by tomorrow. The blog will hopefully be titled "The Bridge" and will summarize classical works that might be daunting to the youth of today. Political issues will also be summarized and assessed. If the name must be changed, I will post the new name on this blog and give the web address. I will still be posting on this blog, but I will also run the other. Pay attention to both! Hope you enjoy what's on Total RB and what will hopefully be on my other blog.

RB

Wednesday, March 31, 2010

My book: Mastermind of Malice

Hey all!


No publicity yet on the second day (jeez, I'm ancy aren't I?) but I know I can make it. I am currently writing a book called "Mastermind of Malice" (meanacing, huh?) and it's based on the PC game "Total Annihilation". Not the most popular gaming series, but that's not the point. Stay updated for chapters of my book. I'd do research on TA before reading, just a suggestion. A quote book will also be shown in little bits. Thanks to my friend BK, who's blog is www.ahoyablogmates.blogspot.com, we can compile famous (or just thought-provoking) quotes from any category or person we wish.

Holla!

Quote for the day after...

Yet another quote for you all


"Snowboarding is an activity for people who think skiing isn't lethal enough."
~Dave Barry

Book Suggestions

Hey, it's a wednesday here in the Midwest. Warm. Sunny. 80 degrees! Why not suggest some good reading? Here are some of my favs:

1. Percy Jackson and the Lightning Thief (read the whole series!) by Rick Riordan
2. Eragon by Christopher Paolini
3. Eldest by Christopher Paolini
4. Mossflower by Brian Jacques
5. The Divine Comedy by Dante Alighieri (consists of Inferno, Purgatorio, and Paradisio)
6. The Ranger's Apperintice: The Ruins of Gorlan by John Flanagan
7. The 39 Clues: The Maze of Bones (read the whole series!) by various authors
8. The Name of this Book is Seceret by Psuedonymus Bosch

Enjoy some fun in da sun!

Tuesday, March 30, 2010

Quote of the Day

Here's a thought provoking quote for you all

"Happiness doesn't mean everything is perfect. It means that you've decided to look beyond imperfections."
~Unknown

Total RB is here!

Hey all! Today, my blog kicks off with only one member. But progress comes in time! See quotes, short stories, comments by others, and snipets from my new book(s) as time goes on. Thanks for viewing!